I often keep most people in my real life out of my business. I'm always so scared that I'm going to be judged...I'm always so scared for that awkward quiet moment after you open you heart and mind to someone. When they are trying to come up with something to say that won't offend me...I just can't take the heat of judgement from others. Only God understands me fully.
Only He can judge us.
Don't feel like you need to give everyone all the answers. Social networks almost force us youth to regularly update our status; we often update in anger or sorrow and then regret our decision because we have so many questioning comments. Not to mention all the drama and bullying that comes with it...
Trust. Something I need to do less? Or is it something I need to do more, with people who are worth my trust? I'm just not sure I trust anyone anymore.
I'm so scared of people not liking me and judging me. I get judged by the clothes I wear and the way I act to conceal the fact that I am actually very shy.
Judgement scares me, so I try so hard everyday not to judge others. I have been told that I'm very good at not judging...but that's not true. I judge just like everyone else on this planet does. It's human nature. I've just learned how to hide it better than others do.
I want to trust again. I hate second thoughts. I hate always wondering if the "truth" is the truth. I don't know what to do....
I can only trust God, I suppose, and will never be absolutely sure of anything accept for my faith in this lifetime.
Judgement keeps the truth hidden as well. That's something for me to think about.
But for now, I want to make sure to say that I may keep my business to myself this time. I may keep all my secrets hidden away so that others can't judge me. It is probably not exactly the best thing to do in this situation....but who do I have to turn to? Who else could understand the situation completely? Who else has been through all that I have been through?
No one...so is that who I trust this time?
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